We were newly married and had been invited by a family to have supper with them. It was a beautiful time and out of nowhere the dear Sister spoke these words to me. At that point of time.. It was mere words of wisdom. Today I have realized how important it is! She warned me that I should never allow the leaven to build up in my life. She made me understand that tomorrow if my husband was corrected or adviced for anything, I should not hold grudge against anyone. For men’s heart can forget things faster and I should not be a leaven that could ferment a fresh batter again. I did understand what she meant yet I did not fully understand the value of that word of Wisdom.
Years from that day, today I know my tongue as a wife has so much powder to either build or destroy my husband. Jezebel was an evil woman and she had such an influence on her husband that made him sin again and again. Herod’s wife Herodias did him much harm by continually speaking about destroying John the Baptist. She went to the extent to skillfully make her husband do what she wanted.
As a wife I need to help my husband, I should filter out evil talk and gossip that would pollute his thoughts. I should be bold enough to gently confront him when he takes a wrong step. I should not be someone who would celebrate his talks of pride. Yes, I should encourage him yet not encourage sin in his life. I need to pray for him. He is my husband and I am his helper.
Oliver has a bestie and her name is Abigail. Do you know who was Abigail in the Bible? She was wife of the wicked Nabal! Then why do we honour her person and name our children after her. Because she was bold and she was not one with her husband in his sin. When she came to know that her husband had sent the people of David, insulting them without giving them any token as a form of gratitude to protect his sheep, she rode at the back of the donkey to settle the matter. It was another thing that the Lord struck her husband, yet she was not one with him in his evil.
To help me understand further on this matter the Lord has been showing me a few things that I can relate at home. I love Oliver and Theodore equally. Yet that doesn’t mean they always do things that pleases me. Like this morning while I gave them snow flakes which are hard ring like structures that can be joined together to make beautiful structures. I usually don’t give them the snow flakes as these are small pieces and children could get easily chocked. So I left them in a room and was washing the dishes while our helper was cooking the meal. Suddenly Theodore started crying and I ran to the room, he was hurt and was slightly bleeding on his forehead. I believe Oliver had pierced a snowflake on his forehead. I was so angry at Oliver and spanked him. I was sad to see Theodore hurt. Yet I had compassion at Oliver as well. It was a mistake! Yes it was indeed an act of disobedience. Because I have been insisting them to play gently, yet I did not want any harm upon Oliver. I did not hate him. This is depicted in the movie Shack as well. Sometimes we begin to have this attitude that we are the ordained children of God, Apple of His eye that nothing wrong can happen to us and if anything wrong does happen to us by the hands of another believer knowingly or unknowingly, the Lord will smite that person. And if the Lord doesn’t do anything, we take things into our hands and want to smite that person with our words..! Why? Because we are so special? Oh No..! While I love Theodore, I don’t love Oliver any less.. God loves all of His children. Yes they might have harmed me, yet God is merciful and will wait for him to repent. May God give me grace to wait and hope for his repentance rather than gloat on his sin. May God show us even more in the coming days to be merciful and not be infected with the leaven of bitterness and even more worse to spread the leaven to our husbands.